Chapter 491 - ADMISSION

HEARING that, warmth simply filled Luo Yan's heart.  He stared at Shen Ji Yun's face.  His cheeks were still tinted red, showing that he was still embarrassed from what just happened. 

He felt a bit sorry and guilty.  He didn't want Shen Ji Yun to have that kind of expression.  Or for him to feel ashamed because of such a simple thing.  All he wanted was for him not to get used to lying, especially when it involved him.  He didn't want their relationship to be sprinkled with lies here and there.  No matter how small.  After all, a simple lie could quickly turn into a bigger one.

He didn't mind it at first.  Because it was just for the simplest things.  And he found it adorable every time Shen Ji Yun tried so hard to spend time with him by saying those lies.  But that thing he did at Chengdu changed his mind.  Following him there without saying anything and then trying to cover it up as a coincidence.  He realized that that kind of attitude could be, sooner or later, unhealthy.

He didn't want Shen Ji Yun to develop such unhealthy habits.  It might look cute and adorable at first, but something like that could soon turn that stalkerish tendency into something possessive and controlling.  The other was already a big vinegar jar.  Something like that was not completely impossible. 

Once they confirmed their relationship, if Shen Ji Yun would continue on like this, Luo Yan would surely get tired.  The love he had for him would deteriorate sooner or later.  And that was something he would prefer not to happen.  Ever. 

He stopped and then chuckled.  Because just now, he admitted something very important. 

He was in love with Shen Ji Yun.

It's probably high-time that he acknowledged that.  Considering just how much he was already considering their future together.  Not doing so would be the height of hypocrisy.

He was going on and on about him not being ready.  But maybe he had already been ready long ago.  He just refused to admit it.  Probably because deep inside, he was afraid.  Afraid of the future that their relationship would bring in their lives.  In his life.

Being in a same-sex relationship was an unfamiliar territory for him.  He had never been in any kind of romantic relationship even in his former life.  But even he knew that a same-sex one would be incomparably harder than a normal relationship. 

It's probably the reason why he kept on putting it off, telling himself over and over again that he was not ready.  But the truth was, it was just an excuse.  An excuse he kept on telling himself so he wouldn't have to take that important step forward.  A step that could take their relationship to the next level.

But even then, without him knowing, he was already thinking of that next step.  The fact that he was already thinking of a future together with him was evidence enough that he was ready to take that step.

Luo Yan smiled at Shen Ji Yun.  "Brother Ji Yun doesn't have to be ashamed or even feel guilty.  In the first place, I'm not even angry about it.  I just hope that Brother Ji Yun won't have to lie about things.  Even if it's the smallest of things, I would prefer to hear the truth."

Shen Ji Yun, who was still feeling guilty about that lie he told and feeling ashamed for the fact that Luo Yan had figured out that he actually had a tell whenever he lied, quickly nodded.  In fact, he nodded so hard he almost looked like one of those bobblehead toys. 

"I won't ever do it again.  I promise!"

After this little incident, he was already so ashamed to even try.  Especially since he now knew that he had a tell.  He would only appear like a fool if he did.

Luo Yan chuckled once again seeing the other's enthusiastic reaction.  It seemed that he no longer had to worry about him being depressed over what he told about his tell whenever he lied.

"Since the reason Brother Ji Yun brought me here was to congratulate me, then shall we hear it?  Brother Ji Yun's congratulations?" he said, completely changing the subject.

"Oh, yes."  Shen Ji Yun cleared his throat.  He looked at Luo Yan and smiled.  "Congratulations, Yan Yan.  You're absolutely amazing today."

Luo Yan smiled back.  "Thank you, Brother Ji Yun."

He stared at Shen Ji Yun.  He traced the other's visage with his gaze.  How handsome.  It would even be better if he was looking at him in reality.  Seeing those beautiful blue eyes.  How wonderful it must be. 

Although he had already accepted his feelings and was even ready to take that next step, this wasn't the time yet.  For one, this body was not yet an adult.  If they really did start a relationship now, his family would kill Shen Ji Yun.  Well, not literally but the idea was still the same.  It would just make his family hate Shen Ji Yun even more.  Something that he wanted to prevent from happening.

But even without that, he knew that it would be hard.  Shen Ji Yun hadn't even confessed to him yet and both his brothers were already antagonistic towards him.  So, he at least had to slowly make his brothers see just how amazing and kind Shen Ji Yun was.  And that the other would never hurt their favorite brother.

And that's another reason why being in a relationship with Shen Ji Yun would be a bad idea.

But didn't mean that he would distance himself from him.  On the contrary, now that he had already admitted his feelings, he probably wouldn't be able to stop himself from being more affectionate.  He could already imagine the blushing look on Shen Ji Yun's face.

"Oh, right, there's something I've always wanted to asl Brother Ji Yun," he said.

"Yan Yan can ask me anything."

"When is your birthday?"

"On the 14th of February," Shen Ji Yun answered, seemingly a bit embarrassed by the date.

Luo Yan was a bit surprised when hearing that.  He didn't expect that Shen Ji Yun's birthday would be on Valentine's Day.  But then it quickly put a smile on his face.

"How wonderful."

He already knew what kind of gift he would give the other.