Chapter 14 - The Great Coax
My Father in Law is Lu Bu
Chapter 14 - The Great Coax
Original by Bro Got a Gun, Translated by James
Liu Mang did not know that he had been the subject of a heated discussion of Boss Cao and CEO Guo - he had already been classified as the sort that are unable to be recruited.
“Swoosh!” Within the golden light, Liu Mang was curiously experiencing everything. Last time, he was beaten up and did not feel anything at all whereas this time, he could have a good feel of what crossing over felt like.
From the flash of the golden ray till its disappearance was less than two seconds. When Liu Mang’s eyes finally adjusted, he found himself in a big tent. Within the tent was a delicate looking woman with fine black hair. She was currently binding the pair on her chest.
“So big?!” Liu Mang’s subconscious mind cannot help but utter those words.
“Ahhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!” The woman looked up and screamed aloud.
“It’s a misunderstanding! A misunderstanding!” Liu Mang remembered. Wasn’t this delicate looking woman with fine black hair Boss Lu’s daughter - that golden armored female warrior that saved him?
Oh shit! Liu Mang had set the spatial coordinates to his Aries Gold Cloth. Alas, he didn’t know that the Aries Gold Cloth would be in Boss Lu’s daughter’s tent.
Now he’s fucked! Not only did he rudely intruded upon someone else’s tent, he even saw that her naked! But that pair was really big! Wrong, wrong! Liu Mang came back from his delusions, he can’t let her continue screaming. If she keep screaming and Boss Lu found out about what he did, then he’ll really be fucked!
With Boss Lu’s three digit fighting prowess, to kill him is as easy as swatting a fly!
Liu Mang rushed forward. He held the woman and covered her mouth.
“So soft!” Because Lu Lingqi had took off the cloth that’s binding her chest, it’s currently entirely devoid of clothing! As Liu Mang was holding her to keep her quiet, he happened to held those pair!
[TL: I guess the author decided to flip Lu Lingqi, name of Lu Bu’s daughter given by Koei, to Lu Qiling. Sounds the same, different characters. Well, do you guys want me to change it to Lu Lingqi or keep it as Lu Qiling? They’re both fictional names anyways.
edit: 4-22-15 Under popular demand, I am changing the name to Lu Lingqi.]
Unable to help himself, Liu Mang grasped them a couple times.
“Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!” Another scream. But this time, it wasn’t Miss Lu. Instead, it was Liu Mang.
He remembered that Miss Lu saved him. However, he would never have thought that although Miss Lu’s fighting prowess could not compared to her father’s, it’s still over eighty!
Thus, Liu Mang encountered a tragedy.
“It’s going to break! Ahhh ahhh ahh!” In the moonlight sky, the Lu Bu army stationed outside the camp all trembled with fear. This scream was enough to cause one to be absolutely horrified.
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“It’s really broken?!” With a sullen face, Liu Mang was looking at his dangling arms. That bitch was very cruel, I only grasped them and she broke my two arms!
In the main tent of the Lu Bu army, Lu Bu was looking at the two in front of him with a bitter smile.
One was his daughter. The other was the Heavenly Man. For Lu Bu, both of them were very important - he could not afford to lose either. And now? This so called Man from Heaven went into his daughter’s tent and even assaulted her! Lu Bu was at a loss.
On the side was Chen Gong, Zhang Liao and Gao Shun. These three men were watching the scene in front of them. They wanted to laugh but dared not laugh. They held their laugher back so hard that even their faces got red.
“Qiling, you can leave first!” First steady his daughter, Lu Bu waved his hands to tell his daughter to leave first.
“Yes father! Humph!” Lu Lingqi glared at Liu Mang. Her glare scared Liu Mang so much that he started trembling.
Seeing his daughter have departed, Lu Bu led Chen Gong, Zhang Liao and Gao Shun and fall onto their knees. “General Who Pacifies the East, Governor of Xu Province, Lu Bu, Lu Fengxian leading my subordinates and military advisors, Chen Gong, Gao Shun and Zhang Liao, pay our respects to the Heavenly Man!”
Liu Mang thought that Lu Bu was going to kill him for touching his daughter! Who would’ve expected that these four men actually kneeled to him. “Heavenly Man? What? Me? Tall?”
“Boss Lu, what are you doing!?” Liu Mang wanted to get Lu Bu up, the people from modern times aren’t used to being kneeled and worshipped. However, he abruptly noticed that he can’t move his arms. He thus gave up.
“Get up first, we can speak after!” With a movement, Liu Mang’s two arms were like rattle drums, swaying all over.
Only after Lu Bu helped Liu Mang relocate his dislocated arms did he understand what they meant by Man from Heaven.
That golden light when he left, they regarded it as something of gods and immortals! Added to the fact that he is surnamed Liu, it became even harder for him to explain himself. They thought that he was sent to earth by the Emperor Liu in Heaven to correct things for the declining Han Dynasty. They called him the Man from Heaven or the Heavenly Man!
Isn’t this situation going to make me into the boss?!
Had Liu Mang not been able to go back, perhaps then he would accept it. Having Lu Bu as his subordinate, his survival rate will certainly increase by a lot!
But now that he knows that he can get back, he had to be stupid to stay in this era, the Latter Han Dynasty, where birds don’t shit and chickens don’t lay eggs and be a shitty boss! No no, not a shitty boss, a warlord.
Liu Mang knew that in the Three Kingdoms period, big eared Liu, black faced Cao and that little authority Sun are all people they he would rather not know! Contend for hegemony in the Three Kingdoms period requires not only wisdom, one must also have a heritage!
Compare wisdom? Even if ten of me together can’t compare to those three. Compare heritage? Big eared Liu have the reputation of the imperial uncle, his benevolence and righteousness was known to the whole world. What do I have? Han imperial clansman? This was something that I self bestowed! Although big eared Liu also self bestowed his status as an imperial clansmen, he was able to gain acknowledgement from the emperor!
Black faced Cao already have two provinces under his control! His strategists, the genius Guo Jia, the Xun family's uncle and nephew, Liu Ye, Cheng Yu and a whole bunch of other people. His generals, the Cao brothers, the Xiahou brothers, Yu Jin, Xu Huang, Xu Chu, Dian Wei (dude’s already dead), Li Dian and more.
And I!? If I really became the boss, then I will only have three generals! Even though all three of them are all experts, two fists cannot withstand four legs! As for strategists, there’s only the old man Chen Gong. And our territory? None! We’re wandering on the streets!
That little authority Sun? Although it’s his brother who’s currently in power, it’s soon to be his turn. Hell, their Sun clan has been passing on their traditions for three generations! Three generations of heritage! Their strategists and generals are all decent and they even have fifty or sixty thousand armored troops!
And I? Taking everything into account, there’s only two thousand people! No matter how strong the Formation Breaker are, they cannot win hundred to one!
Nope, Ain’t gunna do it! I am determined to not do it! If I become the boss, then if I lose then I’m pretty much going to die for sure.
Look at Lu Bu, Yuan Shao, Yuan Shu and Gongsun Zan. All these lost bosses, didn’t they all receive a tragic death?!
If you’re not the boss, then when your boss loses, you can still find a new boss and have a go again!
Liu Mang have experienced the inflexibilities of people in ancient times. For example, Chen Gong doesn’t like Cao Cao, even if Cao Cao showed good intentions, he will still be met with cold rebuke from Chen Gong!
Thus, Liu Mang knew that if he says he didn’t want to be the boss right now, then perhaps Boss Lu would tie him up and force him to be the boss!
Liu Mang turned his eyes and half kneeled toward Lu Bu and said. “The Great Han Dynasty’s days are already numbered. The world shall belong to Lu. The Great Emperor have sent me down the the earthly realm precisely to help Boss Lu accomplish this great cause!”
[TL: Great emperor refers to the first emperor of Han, Liu Bang.]
“What?!” Lu Bu’s eyes were wide open. Unaware, he was emitting murderous aura.
Liu Mang felt as if he was currently being stared by a beast, unable to move. Cold sweat was almost dripping from his forehead. However, Liu Mang was still preserving. He knew that should be back down, the situation would be even harder to deal with.
““The Great Han Dynasty’s days are already numbered! The Great Han Dynasty’s days are already numbered?!” Chen Gong had perplexed eyes. He was completely dazzled.
“The Great Han Dynasty? Lu clan’s great cause?!” Zhang Liao and Gao Shun, although having affections for the Han Dynasty, it wasn’t as deep as their affection for Lu Bu. Thus, they are only looking at Lu Bu.
“Lu Bu, Lu Fengxian, this world belongs to the people of the world. He who have the virtues shall possess it! Your expedition against the foreigners have helped protect our Han people from outside invasions - a quality achievement! You killed Dong Zhou and saved our Liu clan’s little emperor - a grace to our Liu clan! Thus, the Great Emperor, after much consideration, have sent me down to earthly realm to hand this world to your hands!” Under the powerful pressures of the fierce tiger known as Lu Bu, Liu Mang managed to speak these words out one by one.
“Boss Lu, the provisions bestowed by the Great Emperor is located outside of your precious daughter’s tent.” Seeing that Lu bu did not respond, Liu Mang shifted his attention.
“Provisions? Heaven? Great Emperor’s bestowment?!” Lu Bu was mutting to himself as he looked at Liu Mang. He was thinking of something. If Liu Mang was telling the truth about the expedition against foreigners, then Gongsun Zan was also a great general in the expedition against foreigners! He too would have helped the Han people. Why not choose him? If it’s about having grace to the Liu clan then Cao Cao have even welcomed the Emperor Xian of Han to Xudu, allowing him to be spared from the pursuit of the likes of Guo Si and Li Que.
[TL: After finding the old capital Luoyang ravaged by war, Cao moved the imperial court and Emperor Xian to Xudu in 196.]
Why would he, Lu Bu, be the selection?!
If what Liu Mang was saying is to be false, then what of his golden armor? Just by looking one would know that it’s not something that’s made possible to be made currently. Lightweight and with amazing defense. There’s also that golden light that caused Liu Mang to disappear right in front of their eyes!
And now, he even brought provisions out of thin air! Is this not something only gods and devils could do?!
Lu Bu did not get carried away, instead he was calm and composed and kneeled down toward Liu Mang. “This subject Lu Bu shall follow the Great Emperor’s will!”
“Whew!” Liu Mang took a deep breath, he finally settled it. “Boss Lu, shall we go to have a look at the provisions and armor?!”
“Armor?!” Lu Bu was confused. Didn’t Liu Mang only brought with him food?!
“Yep, armor! The Great Emperor knew that you have lost your Sky Piercer, thus he specially ordered the Heavenly craftsmen to make an armor and weapon for you!” Liu Mang was looking forward to seeing Lu Bu wear that Saint Cloth and Trident.
[TL: was thinking of putting scale there because I’m quite certain this is the poseidon's scale.]
“Let’s go!” Lu Bu, having lost his Sky Piercer, had his fighting prowess greatly decreased. Now that he have heard that the Great Emperor had the Heavenly craftsmen craft him a weapon, Lu Bu can’t help but get excited.
For a general, the most important things are the weapons and armor! A good weapon and armor is a general’s second life!
“Let’s go!” Liu Mang lead the front, followed by Lu Bu. Gao Shun and Zhang Liao was in the rear. The muddleheaded Chen Gong also followed.